I had a beautiful visitor the last days. He’s coming from a very different culture, country AND “world”, so our time together was diverse, confronting and loving for sure. Now, that he’s gone – I feel the richness of what he brought and planted while he was being here. A sudden unknown truth softly bubbles up from the inside, like it’s just been waiting to be awakened by “the stranger from this unusual place on the other side of the planet”. Leaving no doubt, that it has always been within since the beginning and yet my conscience was just brought to the attention of this very seed, that I am yet still unable to name.

I dedicate this piece to this man, who fights. Who loves. Who believes, that YOU CAN DO IT! and who won’t stop before reaching what he came for.
You inspire me in unknown places. You challenge me where I did not think I want to expand. And yet you make me feel perfect as I am. Being with you feels easy, light and endlessly fulfilling.

I could stop my post right here with the very question of what KAIZEN is for me today?
Because THIS is KAIZEN for me. Through and through.
And yet, I feel another message of Kaizen hidden here, that I will try to free from my heart into words.

For many months, I wanted to sit down and write for this blog again. Many wonderful issues kept appearing and yet the time was so limited and inner space rare, that I never managed to do so.
Now the time seems to have come again. My wonderful visitor provided a transmission into a different zone of time and space, that gives me the luxury of inner spaciousness beyond the lists of to-do’s.
It brought me to my favorite seat to write. And it will be for you. For myself. And for him.
About something I see represented in him like in no other.

His story…at times hard to bare, at others so inspiring, serves a first understanding of his unorthodox and opposing character in itself.
While I go through his facebook posts and video’s to get a deeper feel of him, I come across this video of inspiration he shared.

I remember myself seeing it on his page a while ago and watching it over and over. I forgot how much it affected me at the time. And all over today.

This video brings up so many colors and different voices in myself:

• I find the scared and outraged mother in myself, that want’s to pull the little boy out when he starts to be so “beaten”, he drops into tears of defeat because of his conviction, that he can’t make it.
  “How dare they! – to make him push into something he is unable or not willing to do”…I hear myself unconsiously repeating the new-age of parenting.
• I find the compassionate human in myself, who feels mirrored into moments of my own life – from childhood to now – the feeling of capitulation because of hopelessness to fulfill the task, to move forward….to get it done.
• I find the strict teacher in myself, that has often encouraged forcefully with an unshaken believe of the other – seeing in him/her, what they are unable to see for themselves right now.
• I find myself in these supporters: In the ones that start to build up the energy around this boy, cheering him on – no doubt that he can do it; and in the other ones, that may be uncertain, if he can make it, but that lose themselves in the energy and the believe of the group vibe that can lift up anyone.
• And finally,….I find myself deeply touched and recognized in my heart of these moments, when we all – often out of unexplainable reasons for us – with the last drop of strength and energy – manage to put all that was needed in this movement, in this action, that declares this fight to be OVER.
  THAT kick, THAT step, THAT conversation, THAT email, THAT getting up for something…. 
  THAT action, just when you about to give up…will bring you the glory.

When this experience takes you over, you collapse under the release of your tension from anger, frustration, hopelessness, struggle – just like this boy – while you get flooded with celebration from outside and within – not really understanding what just happened. Because the only thing you were able to focus on in the end, was to just put one step in front of the other. One more. And one more.

If it still makes sense in these moments?
If your goal of what you want to achieve is still in front of you clearly?
I doubt it.
I believe in these moments all fine print of our carefully drawn vision board disappears – and somewhere between the essence that it left and our imprint of society and family, we keep walking, we keep continuing and the only thing to do is to hold on and to not give up.

I wonder, what this boy would have been left with, being pulled out in the moment he thought, he cannot do it?

What will this experience change in his life? After this incredible victory over his own mind, his own fear, his resignation and his society-trained shame of failing?

How will he see himself and his ability to reach his dreams? To reach the unknown? The unlikely? The unbelievable?

How will his support look and feel like towards his friends and loved ones and towards their goals and abilities?

I wonder…

In my circles I am quite known to be a big kids person.
Whenever I am at a party, a group of kids forms around me, excited to play the “milk carton game”, which isn’t without its physical and creative challenges and was passed on to me many moons ago by my dutch love and remains to be the reliable crowd pleaser!

Most adults unfortunately are not playful or shame-free enough to even participate. Rarely an adult get’s into it. Kids on the other hand, due to their thankfully still remaining nature of curiosity, always START to play.
What I found though, is, that the majority of children today – no matter what age – immediately get’s frustrated, ashamed and gives up if they are not “able” to do it right away.

The idea, that it might take a little bit of effort, a number of tries, different approaches maybe….is not in their upbringing.

I look at my work in the therapy field, where as much as I am seen to be a very sensitive therapist, I am also held as sometimes-kind-of-a-pusher. The feedback that I go in strong from time to time – presuming that the people can handle it, always make me wonder, why I would not believe that?
I am surely determined every moment to create and hold a safe space in my work AND I would never assess my approach as “pushy”, because I don’t even see or feel a doubt, that the people are ABLE.

Many situations come into my mind about in what different areas of life this „giving up easily“ appears.
Living in the mountains, I see plenty of sporty and physically fit people way into their seniority. Lately, it has led me into recurring discussions and arguments with others about the subject of people in their 30’s and 40’s buying an electric bycicle instead of challenging themselves.
I hold up the argument, that surely you can do that, when you are in your 60’s, maybe 70’s and your knees or whatever difficulty in your body shows up and does not let you continue your life of movement at all, but I strongly disagree to letting it be a fix of convenience.

Because how on earth would you know, what your body is capable of, if you don’t test your boundaries?
If you don’t overstep them from time to time?
If you don’t overexhaust your system every once in a while and feel what is needed to regain balance and how long or surprisingly short it takes to recover?
Why would you sidestep such an important part of getting to know your body and yourself?

What kind of world are we building for our kids, where we are striving towards “easiness” in every thinkable situation?
The question constantly appears: „how can it be easier?“
In a time, where we are working ourselves into depression from Monday to Friday, just to run to all sorts of self-development seminars and yoga- and meditation retreats on the weekend, it’s hard to let go of this question. Because it seems fair to ask „can it be easier?”.

So, how do these 2 opposite angles work together?
The HUMAN TRUST question, that I love of „darf es auch einfach gehen?“ -> „is it allowed to be easy?“, which seems to be a very unknown concept for many of us VS. „how can we make everything as easy and struggle-free as possible“. What is the difference between these two?
How does the one make us feel more free and the other one more trapped and stuck?

In Germany for sure we grow up with a failure-is-not-accepted-culture. So to reach a position, where we allow ourselves to not “fight” constantly to be flawless is a new concept, that would allow us to breath within our own journey as we continue – WITH the allowance of making mistakes and therefore opening a continuous field of TRYING for something, even FAILING with it.

I think of Kwenda, my wonderful and always challenging teacher, who said:
“Don’t push your body, if he tells you, that he cannot do this movement…but not, if he’s a lazy body” :-).

I remember, that we all laughed so hard about it, because in all the days of physical challenge we have there, we all know very well, that none of us really reaches the limit and yet, we are so used to give up way before.
We all know to push the last drop of blood out of ourselves for our jobs and yet, when it comes to our deepest abilities to put the unknown into action for US, for our dreams, for the unknown, of what’s possible – we just give 70 %.
Afraid to not make it with our 100 %?
Afraid to look ridiculous?
Yes, afraid even to succeed?
Often enough we are afraid of our own ability.

So this video, together with my beautiful visitor Oualihine Jacob Saddek, my deeply demanding teacher of KAIZEN Kwenda Lima, the ever-repeating loop of Veit Lindau about perseverance and just my late mountain experiences this year within the mountain seminar and my outstanding friend Sofia, give me proof of it:
If taken outside your comfort zone without any other comfortable option – like this little boy – there’s no way to know where the end of your capability really is.
I stand strong with my deep truth, if we listen, we can all hear the difference between easy and too easy.

You are stronger….you are more capable….you are greater….you are simply MUCH, MUCH, MUCH MORE then you think.

THAT is KAIZEN for me today.

Truly & from the ♥

Ulrike